I have a particular talent for naming rock groups. I can't explain it. It's nothing I studied for or earned in any way. It's just in me. I also can't profit from it, because there's no such thing as a Rock Group Name Consultant. But I keep a list of the best ones that occur to me. Proof of their quality is that I'll often Google one after a few months or years, and someone has taken it. I don't insist they pay me for jumping my trademark, but let the record show that I THOUGHT OF IT FIRST! Because I totally did.
Anyway, here's a list of my best œuvres to date. A few include serving suggestions, as to what sort of group might best benefit. You'll note as well that some are already marked "taken"; by the time you read this, a few more may have been claimed as well.
GROUPS ALKI:
Iceweasel (Norwegian Cookie Monster metal group; since taken by a Web browser [?!?] )
The Staff Infection (group made up of adult employees at a given high school)
Porkfish
Arkwelder (Christian metal)
ə (pronounced "schwa")
Röktöpüss (teeny-bopper metal)
Hollow Dogs
Tragically Delicious
Torque
Wahala (since taken)
Backslash
SkinnyPig (emphasis on the first word, like "guinea pig")
Wrench (industrial metal)
Least Heat Moon (folk rock or country rock)
2Can (boy band duo)
Moon Beaver
Destructive Duck
Lumpy Lemon (Phish-like jam band)
8-Trak (old school rap)
Quemarropa (Latin roots rock)
The Kennewick Men
Steelhead (North Coast metal band)
Cavity Search (punk band)
Motherboard
Full Metal Handkerchief
Giraffes Are Delicious (New Wave [which is probably Historical Wave by now] )
Iron Dachshünd (metal parody)
Hence the Problem
The Oil Slick Penguins
Aquatic Sloth (electronica)
The Lost Cosmonauts
Red Franz and the Bog People
Small Metal Stonehenge
New Pence (Mersey Renaissance group)
Uffington Horse (since taken)
Eclectic Eel (as well)
The Underground Tree House (ditto)
Kensington Stone (and again [this would also a great name for a James Bond-style spy] .)
Chewy Louie
The Space Monkey Mafia
Believable Pie
Raw As Recoil
The Screaming Mimis (grrl group)
College Town
Inox (rap group)
Rebar (alt country; front man: Red Diesel)
RSJ (since taken)
I-Beam (metal group)
The Picts
Waterhorse (Scottish folk rock)
Salmonella (Goth girl group)
Lungfish
Hate Cave
Whimsical Physics (smooth jazz)
Onerous O (rapper)
Pipehorse
Rolodex (small, hot swing ensemble)
The Chocolate Skulls
The Satanic Tribbles
If you have a group and you want one of these, be my guest. ("Zero Fee, No Rights Reserved".) Don't see anything you like? I got others. Contact me directly for a custom product, at a mere 15% surcharge. Either way, when someone asks you where you got your name, you can say you were so baptised by a Zen hermit monk. Tell me that isn't an awesome hook.
(Photo courtesy of Brooke Novak and Wikimedia Commons.)
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