Galaxy Song

Here's another burst of insight from that cagey lot down at Monty Python.

This time they put humanity in context with a song drawn, fittingly enough, from The Meaning of Life. One fated from the outset to become a seminal text in my spiritual training, because I too have long asserted that this whole Great Mind thing is just a largish vaudeville show. And here Eric Idle (aka the Pythons' resident Zen master) confirms my suspicions.

For the rest, kindly note that the figures cited in the work are scientifically demonstrable. (Making this is a rare example of a novelty song that contains, like, verifiable data, and is therefore acceptable to Wikipedia, among others.)

And that Eric's knack for a penetrating conclusion is the most electric since Lennon and McCartney.

Follows the tablature:

GALAXY SONG
by Eric Idle

Whenever life gets you down, Mrs. Brown
And things seem hard or tough
And people are stupid, obnoxious, or daft
And you feel that you've had quite enough

Just remember that you're standing on a planet that's evolving
And revolving at nine hundred miles an hour
That's orbiting at nineteen miles a second, so it's reckoned
A sun that is the source of all our power

The sun and you and me and all the stars that we can see
Are moving at a million miles a day
In an outer spiral arm, at forty thousand miles an hour
Of the galaxy we call the Milky Way

Our galaxy itself contains a hundred billion stars
It's a hundred thousand light years side to side
It bulges in the middle, sixteen thousand light years thick
But out by us, it's just three thousand light years wide

We're thirty thousand light years from galactic central point
We go 'round every two hundred million years
And our galaxy is only one of millions of billions
In this amazing and expanding universe

The universe itself keeps on expanding and expanding
In all of the directions it can whizz
As fast as it can go, the speed of light, you know
Twelve million miles a minute and that's the fastest speed there is

So remember, when you're feeling very small and insecure
How amazingly unlikely is your birth
And pray that there's intelligent life somewhere up in space
'Cause there's bugger all down here on Earth

Good Song: Always Look on the Bright Side Of Life

Christian imagery notwithstanding, I maintain that this is the Zennest song ever written. I mean, c'mon, brothers and sisters: isn't it just a detailed exposition of Yunmen's "Every day is a good day"? (His one-line summation, I remind you, of our entire religion.)

Interesting to consider, now my MP3 library runs a week straight without repetition, that this was the first song I ever downloaded, all those years ago. It was a moment I desperately needed it – and coincidentally the beginning of my monastic practice – and it did not disappoint. I'm hoping it will work again now, for me and for all my fellow seekers.

Because these times aren't just dark, they're literally psychopathic. Crucifixion is an excellent metaphor for the way many decent, rational folks feel today, when the most spiteful of our number are seizing control of erstwhile stable nations and threatening to solve our little hand grenade problem by pulling the pin out.

At such times, it's nice to have a concise catalogue of relevant koans to ponder, to concentrate the mind and stimulate insight.

So here it is. Use it in good health, o sangha of mine.

And just remember that the last laugh is on you.

(Incidentally, a .wav file of this song is available at the bottom of this web page. Some of us've got to live as well, you know.)


The lyrics approximate:

ALWAYS LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE OF LIFE
by Eric Idle

Some things in life are bad
They can really make you mad
Other things just make you swear and curse
When you're chewing on life's gristle
Don't grumble, give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best

And always look on the bright side of life
Always look on the bright side of life
If life seems jolly rotten
There's something you've forgotten
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing
When you're feeling in the dumps
Don't be silly chumps
Just purse your lips and whistle, that's the thing

And always look on the bright side of life
Always look on the bright side of life
For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word
You must always face the curtain with a bow
Forget about your sin, give the audience a grin
Enjoy it; it's your last chance anyhow

So always look on the bright side of death
Just before you draw your terminal breath
Life's a piece of shit
When you look at it
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true
You'll see it's all a show
Keep 'em laughing as you go
Just remember that the last laugh is on you

And always look on the bright side of life
Always look on the right side of life

Always look on the bright side of life
Always look on the bright side of life

(Worse things happen at sea, you know)

Always look on the bright side of life...

I mean, what've you got to lose?
You know, "you come from nothing, you're going back to nothing..."
What've you lost?
Nothing!