WW: Spruce Warrior

(During World War I so many hale young men were removed from our forests by the US military that the Army Air Corps had to raise "Spruce Squadrons" to cut down the trees our boys were no longer felling because they were in France and the military needed wood for aircraft.

I know, I know. Don't say it.

Most of these kids came from the East and Midwest and other places where they don't know what a real tree is. So they died like flies -- logging, especially in the day, was as deadly as warfare. Interesting aside: many of the Spruce Warriors were conscientious objectors, assigned this as alternative service. So a kind of patriotic censure hung over these units, despite the fact that they served steadfastly in a vital, extremely dangerous [if faintly ridiculous] duty.

My great grandmother used to photograph their military funeral parades down Main Street -- about one a week -- and send prints to the families. Fortunately the Littlejohns never received one of her envelopes; their son Calvin, of 60 Spruce Squadron, died in 1951.)

Forth Bridge Koan

An English, Irish, and Scottish steelworker are sitting on the Forth Bridge, lunchboxes in their laps.

"Stike 'n' kidney pie, stike 'n' kidney pie," grumbles the Geordie. "If there's anoatha stike 'n' kidney pie in this lunchbox, I'll jump!"

He opens the box. "STIKE AND KIDNEY PIE!" he screams, and throws himself off the bridge.

The Irishman doesn't notice; he's too fixated on his own misery. "Bacon 'n' cabbage fer breakfast," he growls. "Bacon 'n' cabbage fer supper! Sure, if dere be bacon 'n' cabbage in dis lunchbox, Oi jump!"

He opens the box. "BACON AND CABBAGE!" he screams, and throws himself off the bridge.

The Scot, none the worse for finding himself alone, mutters, "Haggis 'n' neeps, och how Ah hate haggis 'n' neeps! If Ah see haggis 'n' neeps in this lunchbox, right then: Ah jump!"

He opens the box. "HAGGIS AND NEEPS!" he screams, and throws himself off the bridge.


Two days later the widows meet at the funeral.


"If only," sobs the Geordess, "if only I'd packed soomthin oatha than stike 'n' kidney pie, me Nigel'ud still be alive!"

"Sure!" agrees her Irish sister. "N'if only Oi'd not made bacon 'n' cabbage, just fer the day, me Seán'd still be with us!"

They turn to the Scotswoman, expectant.

"Well dinna luik at me!" she snaps. "Ma husband packed his ane lunch!"


(True story.)


Wu Ya's commentary: "A good tenzo is worth his weight in gold."


(Photo of the Forth Rail Bridge courtesy of Chris Combe and Wikimedia Commons.)

WW: $5000 boat

(Had a long chat with the fellow who drew and built this motorsailer. Whole vessel cost him $5000, including a woodstove he also drew and built. Can't comment on the seakindly of his design, since I've never sailed it, but you can't argue with the price. Looks great belowdecks, too.)

Incola Ego Sum

I once had a car that was more like a home

I lived in it, loved in it, polished its chrome
If some of my homes had been more like my car
I probably wouldn't have travelled this far

Paul Simon, Cars Are Cars



(Photo of Dorothea Lange, Resettlement Administration photographer, courtesy of Rondale Partridge, the Library of Congress, and Wikimedia Commons.)

WW: Indian War veteran

(H.J. Cameron here served in Company C of the 2nd Washington Territory Volunteers, a settlers' militia of the 1850s Blockhouse Wars. The stone doesn't say whether he was a casualty, but the lack of birth and death stats suggests he was. If so, he was one of a select few; the Blockhouse Wars were famously more smoke than fire, at least on the Green Side. [And for white folks.])

Mantra

That which doesn't kill me, makes me kinder.

(Photo courtesy of Joaquim Alves Gaspar and Wikimedia Commons.)

WW: 70s jars

(Anybody else remember when coffee was sold in fancy jars you could use as kitchen canisters afterward? I think half my mom's canisters – such as these – came from there. Note the US Bicentennial
pattern at right.)