Who Are You Trying To Be?

Last year I linked to an excellent Jason Pargin article called 7 Reasons Americans Have Stopped Trusting One Another. (He writes under the pseudonym David Wong on Cracked.com.) I was commenting on a compelling point he makes there, to wit, what "putting yourself in someone else's shoes" implies.

But that's not the only Zen the article contains; another favourite moment relates to the 8 Worldly Dharmas, on which I posted this past August.

In Jason's words, human behaviour is ultimately directed by two desires:

1) The person you desperately want to be.

2) The person you desperately want to avoid becoming.

So that's 8WD all over again. It's also conventional Buddhism à la Thich Nhat Hanh, who emphasises the notion of mental "seeds", or impulses that arise in the mind and either get "watered" (i.e., indulged or praised) or "not watered" (left to languish).

Thich Nhat Hanh suggests we be mindful of these seeds – which exist unremarked in our minds till they sprout as actions, or even habits – and make conscious decisions to water or not water them.

And that's highly effective practice. However, I think Jason's insight – that those seeds come from somewhere too, and knowing where is important – is a necessary second level.

That thing you want – what do you think you'll accomplish with it?

That button that gets pushed – what is that wired to?

That insult that enrages you – why do you care?

That compliment you received – why does that please you? (And how about that other compliment, that leaves you unmoved – or even discomfits you. What's up with that?)

Those positive feelings that arise in a given event – what do you imagine you've accomplished?

That thing you do in a given situation - what are you trying to become, or not become, when you do that?


In Jason's terms, when you feel seeds begin to swell, you should ask yourself, "What do I want to be that's manipulating me to do/say/be this thing?", or "What do I not want to be that's manipulating me to do/say/be this thing?"

I like Jason's perspective, because it goes to the bedrock of delusion. Creating ourselves in this ephemeral world is a lot of what we do here.

If we can give that up – or at least leash it – we stand a chance of getting off this carousel.

(Photo courtesy of Unsplash.com and a generous photographer.)

Hair

(This is an excerpt from a manuscript about an epic outbacking trek I took six years before I became a monk. As you can see in the photo at left, some things have changed.)

Shortly after 0700 I coasted down the long hill into Conconully, skirting its round, post-card reservoir. Motoring quietly through drowsing neighbourhoods, bright clapboard glowing like a remembered summer, I was struck, as often on the Gold Side, by a sense of place. Hometown, as few Puget Sound ones are anymore.

A regiment of impact sprinklers had swept the state campground's day use area as clear as a July schoolyard, but that suited me fine; its deserted parking lot was perfect for peeling off my Michelin Man layers.

So laying down in the bed of the truck, I shed my December kit by stratum, cool air sweet on my nakedness as the long underwear at last came off. Then I squirmed back into my trousers, grabbed my toilet kit, and scrambled back over the tailgate. While setting bath water from the nearest sprinkler on the stove, I caught my reflection in the canopy.

The trendiest salon in New York City couldn't have given me that hairstyle. It fractalled off in a hundred directions, licks and wisps corkscrewing out like an armoury fire. If I'd had a black turtleneck, I could have passed for the hippest artiste in all of Greenwich Village. But bare-chested in dirty jeans, I just looked like an extra from Deliverance.

I dipped my comb and started in, and was soon dripping like I'd dunked my head to the shoulders, but never really mastered the situation.

Buddhist monks say they shave their heads to free themselves from attachment. Bollocks. They do it to free themselves from their hair.

(Adapted from Rough Around the Edges: A Journey Around Washington's Borderlands, copyright RK Henderson.)

WW: Predator competence test

Note to readers: I'm in the process of moving this blog to a new host. Please be alert for a URL change in the next weeks.

(Can you spot the two sheep that, if you were a cougar, coyote, or bear, you would really not want to mess with?)

Appearing also on My Corner of the World.

Happy Days Teisho

"Sit on it."

WW: Summer 2017 vs. Summer 2020

Stuff I Thought Would Pass

As a meditation on the unreliable nature of impermanence, I offer this week an incomprehensive list of dubious fads I assumed would long have returned to obscurity by now:

Bottled water
Right wing politics
Racism
Free market fundamentalism and "free" trade.
Wearing your trousers hanging off your arse
Evangelical Christianity
Obscenity-filled rap
Twitter
Wearing shorts year-round
Self-defeating copyright enforcement
Private healthcare schemes
Reality television
New Age malarkey
Proscription of ex-convicts
Man-hating feminism
Wearing beach thongs as actual footwear
Red-baiting (you know, now there's no Reds)
Misogyny
Liberal parties without platform or ideology
Churchie Zen
Undirected development and exploitation of land
The notion that sex is the worst thing that can happen to you
Hatred of foreigners

It's worth pointing out that a few positive things have also survived my scepticism. Wikipedia and Internet radio come to mind. 

(Photo courtesy of Andreas Trepte and Wikimedia Commons.)

WW: Chimes of fortune

(I found these by the side of the road while riding my bike. They're meditation chimes. There's a small broken hanger on the lower end that may be implicated in the accident that put them, somewhat the worse for wear but otherwise intact, on the shoulder, but the rest remains a mystery. Another bicycling monk? Doesn't seem likely in my little town. But who knows?

Chalk it up to found dingstock and another Zen mystery.)

Appearing also on My Corner of the World.